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Best ways to understand your partner

Best ways to understand your partner

There are times that enable both you and your spouse to know each other.

Do something new together

Find an activity that neither of you have much experience with. Take tennis lessons, karate, golf, salsa dancing, stepping, rock climbing, swimming, something. Just make sure both of you are newbies and can learn it together.  You will be out of your comfort zones and probably looking a little silly, but your spouse is there looking silly at the same time.  Witnessing your spouse when they are being stretched will teach you a lot about them.

Ask questions and really listen

I think most people ask the question, “how was your day?“. But how many times do we really listen.  If not careful, that can become almost a greeting, and not really a question that you care for the answer.  So ask the question and really listen when you do.  Take it deeper and ask more engaging questions about what they’ve said.  You may have to guage the amount of questions you can ask, but no matter the number of questions, focus on really listening.  You can learn a lot by listening to your spouse.

Date them regularly

Spending regular one-on-one time is something that I cannot emphasize enough.  When my wife and I are consistent with Date Night I feel really connected to my wife.  I feel like I do know what she wants and expects of me, and what she wants to say next. Besides getting to know your spouse better, it is just fun to hang out.

Spend many many years together

About half of marriages end in divorce, and probably more are still together, but separated.  If you really want to know your spouse.  Spend years and years together.  That is the single best way to get to know somebody.  Spend a lot of time with them.

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